Ascendant Life Alignment Blog

From Anxiety to Excitement How to breathe our way into "Being in the Zone"

3/10/2021

If you would rather see the video head here: How to breathe our way into "Being in the Zone"

In a previous article I addressed how Anxiety might actually be good news since it shows what is truly important to us: whether it be meeting love, creating new art, starting a new exciting career or resolving a communication with someone we care about!

However we can’t possibly experience any of this if we are bogged down by anxiety since it manifests itself physically either by accelerating our heart rate or freezing us in place which literally corresponds to the fight-or-flight stress response!
So how do we go from Anxiety to Excitement in the easiest way, with the least amount of pain and in the most effective way possible?
This is what I am about to share in this newsletter and the following ones, with practical steps you can follow, that I found most helpful in my practice.

1. Why conscious breathing is essential
Did you know that when we breathe in our heart rate speeds up and it slows down when we breathe out?
It has been shown indeed that rapid breathing tends to generate stress and contribute to panic attacks. Conversely any kind of stress triggers faster breathing, which in turn increases stress even more in a vicious feedback cycle.
On the bright side, since our heart beat slows down when we breathe out, if we breathe out twice as slowly as we breathe in, we can calm down in just a few minutes!
Biofeedback devices allow us to observe on a screen how deep, regular breathing slows and stabilizes the heart beats. As the HeartMath® Institute’s research shows, regular breathing regulates the nervous system by effectively balancing out the sympathetic and parasympathetic or in other words the energetic, fight-or-flight and the relaxing parts of our autonomic nervous system. This synchronization of the breath brings about a state of coherence between the heart, the brain, and major bodily functions that results in clearer thinking, increased focus and decision making as well as better digestion, sleep and hormonal balance.

2. Why positive emotions are the way to harmony and health
Research at the HeartMath Institute has shown that one of the most powerful factors that affect our heart’s rate changing rhythm is our feelings and emotions.
“In general, emotional stress – including emotions such as anger, frustration, and anxiety — gives rise to heart rhythm patterns that appear irregular and erratic. Scientists call this an incoherent heart rhythm pattern. Physiologically, this pattern indicates that the signals produced by the two branches of the ANS are out of sync with each other. This can be likened to driving a car with one foot on the gas pedal (the sympathetic nervous system) and the other on the brake (the parasympathetic nervous system) at the same time.
This can cause our body to operate inefficiently, deplete our energy, and produce extra wear and tear on our whole system. This is especially true if stress and negative emotions are prolonged or experienced often.
In contrast, positive emotions send a very different signal throughout our body. When we experience uplifting emotions such as appreciation, joy, care, and love; our heart rhythm pattern becomes highly ordered, looking like a smooth, harmonious wave [...] This is called a coherent heart rhythm pattern. When we are generating a coherent heart rhythm, the activity in the two branches of the ANS is synchronized and the body’s systems operate with increased efficiency and harmony. It’s no wonder that positive emotions feel so good – they actually help our body’s systems synchronize and work better.”
What we knew intuitively has now been shown in multiple ways through scientific studies:
Nurturing positive emotions benefits our heart, the well-being and good function of our bodily systems regulating sleep, digestion and hormonal balance. It also impacts how clearly we think, the quality of our intuition and creativity, the decisions we make and the actions we take! In other words, in practicing proper breathing and emotional balancing, we can quickly attain a sense of Being in the Zone.
Distinct from a state of relaxation, being in the zone can be very alert and active, such as a surfer dancing in the waves ~ What does Being in the zone look like for you?

If you would like to experience it, you are welcome to try this special guided HeartMath® practice tutorial Breathe your way into "being in the zone" in this video series : How to breathe our way into "Being in the Zone"
It has been shown to make a world of difference in our every life ~ enjoy at your own time and I look forward to hearing what you discovered!

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How to feel joy throughout our body: a key factor in diffusing anxiety!

2/17/2021

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1. Understanding the physiology of anxiety to be able to overcome it

With anxiety comes the symptoms of the primary "fight-or-flight response:
- Our breathing accelerates and becomes fast and shallow.
- Our heart rate accelerates
- Our blood sugar spikes
- Our senses get sharper
- Our bloodstream gets flooded with the stress hormones adrenaline, cortisol and norepinephrine

When these hormones and our nervous system put our body on high alert, our musculoskeletal system contracts and springs into action to be ready to face an intense situation. While helpful for the occasional life challenges, such intense contraction in our muscles and joints as well as the long-term exposure to stress hormones are most damaging to our physical and mental health in the long run. The American Medical Association has noted that stress is the basic cause of more than 60 percent of all human illness and disease and it is recognized by many as the No. 1 proxy killer disease today. For example, long-term exposure to cortisol and other stress hormone can contribute to weight gain, heart conditions, digestive issues, insomnia, autoimmune diseases, burnout and can disrupt almost all our body's processes.

2. Why movement is an essential remedy

As a result of too many or too intense perceived threats, our body never lets the guard down and high strung tension starts becoming a constant and pervasive reality in our nerves, muscles and joints, with contraction in these typical places: shoulders, neck, lower back, hips, and jaw.
This is where movement comes in! Movement, a direct outlet for the physical stress response, prevents, diffuses and relieves the buildup of muscular and nervous tension.
Some major benefits of movement:
- Freeing the body from tension patterns
- Allowing our tissues and joints to relax
- Allowing our mind to relax: focusing only on our body's movements frees the mind and is like meditation in motion.
- Allowing to burn the energy that has been stored in the muscles, letting them return to their normal resting state after exercise is complete.
- Strengthening muscles and bones
- Increasing brain's feel-good neurotransmitters:

Endorphins through aerobic activity. Bringing a natural high and helping to reduce stress.
Dopamine through productive action. Bringing a sense of reward through the progress accomplished when we complete something such as a work-out or yoga class.

This is why many people notice their anxious thoughts and negativity quiet down during a workout, and their mood starts to improve. In addition, the continuous and repetitive movement of the body allows us to process the perceived threat. Overall moving not only feels good, but in the mid and long run it can also reverse the feeling of powerlessness that comes with anxiety by dramatically increasing our confidence, informing our brain that we are gearing up to potential challenges from a place of solid, calm and real strength.

- Exercising for twenty minutes or more can dramatically enhance our mood by releasing endorphins which relieve pain and increase a sense of well-being and relaxation.
- Exercise in short bursts. Even brief bouts of physical activity offer benefits. For instance, if you can't fit in one 30-minute walk, try a few 10-minute walks instead. Taking a break to move and stretch, bike, dance or go for a walk is incredibly rewarding!

What movement calls to you? Whatever you choose, what is most important is making regular physical activity part of your lifestyle!

3. Massage as a key therapy to deepen relaxation and joie de vivre!

Massage therapy can have a major impact in relieving anxiety by eliciting a relaxation response in our nervous system. In activating our parasympathetic system (the relaxing branch of our autonomic nervous system) massage plays a key role in rectifying the unbalance that occurs when anxiety strikes. It does this by reeducating our system to find its way back to comfort, ease, relaxation and flow. It is also highly effective at diffusing tension patterns, lowering heart rate and nourishing our tissues with more blood flow and oxygen.

The Mayo Clinic reports that after just one session, a 60-minute massage can lower cortisol by up to 30 percent. Massage is also effective because of the release of three major “feel-good” chemicals into the body: endorphins, oxytocin and serotonin. A study published in the journal Depression and Anxiety found participants who received regular massage therapy for 12 weeks had a 50 percent reduction in anxiety symptoms. And the benefits weren’t short-lived either: symptom reduction remained at 50 percent 26 weeks after the therapy had ended.

Overall, massage therapy allows us to reconnect with a deeper sense of well-being and enjoyment enabling us to feel good all around!
We can anchor this grounded sense of calm, ease and wellness and bring it more readily to our everyday life. We are therefore more likely to feel stronger, resourceful and to bring more radiant and positive energy to our life, even in the face of challenging situations!

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When we have anxiety it may actually be good news!

2/16/2021

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When we touch on a key desire, we might feel a spark, a feeling of resonance in our chest, or even a jolt..and it might be scary too! After all, if this is a long time buried desire, we have reasons why we haven’t taken it on just yet. Sometimes, the feeling that comes right after we touch on a key aspiration is anxiety - And as surprising as it may seem, it’s the sign that we’re on to something good!

The gift on the other side of anxiety
If you ever feel anxious or blocked, it’s definitely not a pleasant state to be in…
It’s like wanting to dive in a swimming pool and even though we might know it’s safe, somehow we freeze.
So to get out of feeling in this negative state, I want to share 2 steps that have been the most useful to my patients and myself. These offer a reframing of anxiety, and this might just be a reminder for you, but hopefully a good one!

1. Realizing that all our emotions have a positive function.
Even the worst emotions like fear have a key role. If we are going to cross a busy road, then fear is here to protect us so we don’t get hurt. So what is anxiety here for? What does it want us to pay attention to?
Clearly it's a big charge of energy when we feel anxious. Why is that?
Check in for a moment and see if there is something you are anxious about at this time. If so, and whatever it is: something you want to accomplish, a creative project to take on, a new career to explore, a special person to go on a date with or a conversation you know you need to have, if it didn’t matter then you wouldn’t be anxious!
This is the first key and why we need to pay attention. The first message of anxiety is : It matters!!!
And so no amount of general relaxation, yoga or breathing alone is going to solve it until we address the gift inside. It would be like sweeping a treasure under the carpet.There is a gift ready to be found within the feeling of Anxiety, there's a calling: There's a very good reason why this matters to YOU in particular.
It points to the core of your most important desires. So my first piece of feedback here is: Do not ignore it.
- If we sweep it under the rug, then we can get to a state of pervasive anxiety when we don’t even know why we feel this way any longer, it’s just the state we're in..and we can get physically sick if we continue to ignore and repress it.
- On the other hand, we can listen to the messenger and hear it as good news:
There is something important to us, something to be really excited about on the other side of it: meeting love, creating new art, starting a new career we’re passionate about, resolving a communication with someone we care about.
It’s not about getting rid of the messenger, it’s about pulling the thread until we get to the gift that is truly exciting to us!

2.Recognizing that anxiety is a kind of negative visualization
When something feels too big for us, or we don’t know how to go about it, or it triggers fears because it’s similar to situations that haven’t worked in the past, then we start fearing it and our mind anticipate something negative. Simply put, we visualize negatively.
Now the good news is: if we can visualize negatively, so can we positively!
If this is important, AND we start believing that we can achieve it, then the same big emotional charge turns positive and we can start to get excited!
So I hope these steps help to give a context where anxiety isn’t just negative but simply the portal to excitement and enthusiasm.
Now how do we go from Anxiety to Excitement in the easiest way, with the least amount of pain and in the most effective way possible? This is what I will be sharing about next, with practical steps you can follow, that I found most helpful in my practice.

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How to clarify our desires in the New Year?

12/30/2020

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More often than not, some of our most important desires get buried in the busyness of everyday life and the pressure of immediate productivity. With more time to reflect around the holidays and with the New Year, our true longings often resurface and come out.

We may be, however, at a different stage on the spectrum of being clear on what they are at this time. If, for example, we are not feeling a strong calling then we are probably not in touch with our true priorities.
If so, this is a great time to engage in a process to put our key desires in the driver's seat of our life. Here are a few steps I found especially helpful for my patients and myself, that I hope will be beneficial to you:

A. Clarifying process
While New Year’s resolutions are well-known, if we want them to stick, we first need to clear the way to give them a strong foundation!
For tips about clearing your physical space see my previous article: Being home

Let’s take advantage of the quieter time of winter to reflect and assess on what has or hasn’t been working in our lives, especially in terms of habits and relationships. This clarification gives us the chance to take back our power in making better choices forward. Of course, these can be complex situations. And so here are some questions to start with:
Have we given it our best, genuine effort? If not, what is in the way of us giving it our best effort? Can we commit for a given time to give it our best effort? If we have: what can we see is in the way in the given situation? Is there anything more we can do?
If we assess that there is absolutely nothing more we can do, then it is time to release it. Either way, this clarification process is highly empowering for us and everyone involved when it is done with compassion and genuine intention.

B. Attending to our True Desires
Once we have gained clarity on what we do want to keep, to try or to release, we can focus on our desires with all the care and patience new seeds require:

Planting your seeds in fresh soil for the New Year to come!
Just as sowing seeds in winter is an old technique used worldwide. where the seed lies dormant before sprouting in the spring, we can make the most of hibernation and let our true desires emerge and take root in fresh soil.

“Don't judge each day by the harvest you reap but by the seeds that you plant.”
- Robert Louis Stevenson
Focus and nurturing
"What you give your attention to, grows."
- Deepak Chopra.

Putting all our attention on what we desire is key especially if we are taking on something new. Just like different plants need different kinds of watering and exposure to sun, we have to pay close attention to what is required for every chosen desire to take root in our life:

Whether it is about rejuvenating our health and well-being, deepening our relationships, shifting gears in our career, making space for our own creative expression, it all requires a special kind of care and nurturing!

What will it be for you? I am looking forward to hearing about it!
“What blooms from beautiful seeds of thought becomes a symphony of colorful abundance.”
- Jazz Feylynn

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How to find our own harmony and open up to the blessings of our Winter season.

12/29/2020

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In the wisdom of Chinese medicine, it is by living in unison with nature that we experience greater harmony with our bodies and ourselves. Because we are part of nature, being observant of its cycles has us learn about ourselves. In order to find harmony and thrive we first have to balance our physiology and activities in accordance with the climate.

A. Recharging our energy in Winter time: some happy ways to hibernate!
1. Seize the light
Getting all the light we can is key: preferably outside in the sun or using a light lamp if needed to help with SAD (Seasonal Affective Disorder.) Decorating our home with colorful lights even before Christmas helps expose us to more joyful light. Let us be inspired by the spirit of Diwali, the Indian celebration at the end of October, that celebrates the triumph of Light over Darkness ! As DJ Kyos puts it: “Happy Diwali. May your life turn up to be Lit everyday ”

2. Nurturing Warmth
When we feel warm, our parasympathetic system (the relaxation part of our autonomous nervous system, opposite to fight or flight) takes over and puts us in resting and recovery mode, which is essential to recharging our energy! As we saw in the first part of this article, the purely physical states FEEL similarly to our body as corresponding emotions. So on the positive side, while we cultivate warmth and light in our physiology, we are opening ourselves up to emotions that we experience just the same: comfort, bright and warm hearted feelings allow for us to relax and let our true desires emerge spontaneously, which isn’t an option in survival mode.

A few ways to get our body temperature up:
- Exercising: whenever possible, exercising outdoors is a wonderful way to get both light and warmth while strengthening our heart and immune system. Hiking, running near trees as well as skiing or surfing allow us to enjoy the wonders of nature.
- Warming drinks and foods: while so called “comfort foods” are often too heavy with excess of fats or sugar and create unbalance in our bodies leading to excess of toxins and weight, there are plenty of healthy, comforting, nutritious and delicious foods to choose from! For more information see: http://www.chloelabare.com/cleansing-foods.html. For winter, besides root vegetables that make a wonderful base for stews and soups, there are also healthy alternatives to sugar such as Monk fruit or Stevia for those who have a sweet tooth!
- Taking a warm shower or a bath: this is the simplest way to cleanse effectively as the warm water opens up our pores and flushes out toxins. It also increases blood circulation and helps remove pain-causing chemicals that build up in tissues. As a result, muscle pain goes away faster. Immersing our body in warm water, reminiscent of being in the womb, can provide the safest, soothing way to unwind at the end of the day.
- Sitting by a fire: a warming, soul lifting and hypnotically relaxing experience that has also shown in a study by the University of Alabama to lower blood pressure and facilitate positive social interactions.

3. Cultivating warmth and light in yourself and with loved ones
These times more than ever, show how essential and precious our bond is to loved ones: Practicing compassion for the challenges of any given relationship and gratitude for its gifts allow us to generate a positive field of attraction and kindness where meaningful bonds can grow. While indoor gatherings are not safe at this time, we can create opportunities for wonderful intimate or playful times via an old style phone call or by “hanging out” on a video call. I bet we will have plenty of fun holiday backgrounds to choose from : )

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Is your Home supporting you? Part 2

12/29/2020

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Practical Steps Part 2
In order to make our home a supportive environment, we saw that the first principle is to keep only what gives us energy: once we have accomplished this with a good spring cleaning and keeping only what inspires us at this time, we can apply the second principle:
Create space by ..creating structure!This is a simple yet powerful principle. Even if we have a small space, creating boundaries within one space to have particular areas dedicated to special activities, actually has the impact of multiplying our space! it literally feels bigger because it offers a multiplicity of experiences.

Start by taking a moment to imagine what spaces you would like to create, in addition to the necessary sleeping, eating and work areas: maybe you would enjoy a Self Care area, maybe a Fun area!

Then Focus on how you would like each space to FEEL. Then adjust and recreate.

To take just a few examples here:

How about making your Sleeping Area a wonderful place to retreat, to rest and dream?
For this to happen it needs to feel safe and peaceful. it can also be a place conducive for fun as long as it is in a calming way: we would want to remove anything that that keeps you alert and feels busy, like our phone, the news, but it could be, rather that the business of TV, watching a movie or documentary instead that helps you unplug, or books to read or with great pictures to look at, or simply soothing music .. In brief anything that makes you want to go to bed and rest and dream at the end of your day.
In the same way, I want to encourage you to dedicate an area for Self Care . If you exercise at home, it's helpful to have a dedicated area with a yoga mat stored or your living room rug as long as it’s uncluttered and inviting for you to use it. Or if you exercise outdoors it can also be your bathroom with soothing light, a lush plant, a candle, a visible message that feels uplifting for you whenever your eyes come across it!
Similarly, for your Work Area or the Kitchen that are more functional spaces, it is typically good to have them ready to be used, organized.

For work: in a way that’s ideal for your productivity.
For the kitchen: inviting, clear, appetizing, with fresh food available, anything joyful to you personally!

In addition, reserving a space as a Fun Area is paramount! What can it be like for you? Maybe music instruments, or games, books, craft and art supplies ready to use in an area of your choice. Think of it as your own game room : )
Finally the Entrance Area by the front door is also a crucial space that is best kept clear, uncluttered, inviting to go in and out your home smoothly. It needs to be organized so it is easy to go out: for example without spending time looking for keys! So we might want to have a dedicated place to hang coats, to store shoes and keys, as well as something homey, nice to welcome you when you get home : )
Overall it is highly beneficial to have a clear circulation between the spaces so you can enjoy going from one to the other, just like going from one neighborhood to the other in a city, in a way that supports your organic daily flow with ease and joy.

I hope this helps opening possibilities and empowering your unique flow in your home: Enjoy exploring and adjusting and discovering as you go!

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Is Your Home Supporting You? Part 1

12/1/2020

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How has it been for you to be home? Probably more than ever before, like most of us. For the people I know and myself, it’s been both a blessing and a curse. On one hand it’s been liberating: “Yay!” say some, “I don’t have to be anywhere!” On the other hand: well we might feel like “I’m in the same place I was yesterday and the day before!” So when we feel trapped, how do we get out of the box and like the cartoon SpongeBob use some good Imagination?

Let’s look at both sides of the box so to speak:

On the positive

We’ve gained time and for some, a lot of time, avoiding commute. We’ve also gained flexibility in our schedules.
We have so much more energy available since we don’t have to deal with traffic, public transportation, how stressful and tiring it can all be!
If you are a home lover like me, we can enjoy being cozy at home.
We have choice, freedom to mix it up at any time!

On the negative

It’s all in one place! it may feel small after a while.
We don’t get to move as much.
It may feel like one uninterrupted long chunk of time since we don’t have a structure any longer that can support in giving its own space and time to the diversity of our needs and interests.
We may be scared to go out again out of fear of being unsafe in the re-opening transition.

Yes we have choice! and it can be overwhelming. Either way, with Being home: It’s all up to us!
Whatever the situation we are in, whether we are financially or health challenged or we are lucky to be safe and healthy in these times, we can make our home a supportive environment. We can take it as a good challenge that can benefit us now and in the long run.

Practical Steps Part 1So today I want to offer practical steps with two main principles for making your home a supportive environment: nurturing, inspiring, relaxing, just however you like it!
The first principle is overall to keep ONLY what brings you energy. What is needed to accomplish this is:
A: Create Space In order to create space, we first need to discard what is not needed.

a: Sorting out and discarding is a process all in itself that can be a tough one at first but soon enough, it can be liberating like “getting rid of dead weights.”
I find that it really helps to break it down in separate tasks:

Sort out your clothes this week.
Sort out your paperwork next week.
Sort out your Fridge tonight etc..

The more we create space, the easiest it becomes to clear any corner filled with unnecessary stuff. We can make it a hobby or a game for a while : )
b: Complete with your past with peace and gratitude You may want to take a few special times to sort out belongings with sentimental value to decide on their new place in your life. Unexpected positive benefits from clearing out can come as:

Discovering hidden treasures: like brand new clothing or dishes you forgot all about.
When you uncover a forgotten drawing or music instrument you might be reminded that this old hobby would bring you joy again and it is time to give it a fresh start!
Enjoying giving away what you are no longer using but can benefit someone else, may it be friends or a second-hand store.
Finally, if something from the past only has sentimental value, then an easy way to keep the sentimental memory and still create space is to take pictures of it, and lovingly store it in a digital file.

In addition to the benefits of creating space and cleanliness, most people find that it also helps clear and organize their mind, which makes making good choices that much easier!
B: Bring in Energy and Joy

A simple way to do this could be to adjust the lightning, or play with the colored lighting depending on the mood and the time of the day.
Bringing in a new plant, some flowers!
Making a teapot or other utensil part of your new daily routine.
Put a special picture in a visible place: a loved memory, a beautiful image, a message to inspire you or makes you laugh!

I hope this helps opening possibilities and empowering your unique flow in your home and I would love to hear your ideas as well : )

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